Surprise: many Kurdish men work too much - according to their spouses
Tuesday, 17 July 2012, 09:42 GMT
Kurdish women complain at men for over-working
The Kurdish Globe, www.kurdishglobe.net
By Salih Waladbagi
Kurdish men claim they too much as a necessity to cope with growing family expenses
Nowadays, some Kurdish women complain that their men are working too much and neglecting their social activities. On the other hand, some women say that their men can strike a balance between work and family.
Social researchers believe that the overworking of men will leave significant negative effects on educating their children because they won't have enough time to spend with them. The researchers also say this will lead to greater social problems in Kurdish families, including divorce and separation.
Nariman Tahir, a social researcher, told The Kurdish Globe that over the past several years, life has become more complicated in Kurdistan and this has obliged men to work harder. He remarked that if men spend excessive time outside of their families then unexpected problems may emerge.
"Working too much and ignoring social activities may ruin the happiness of a family. The reason is lack of social awareness among men and this will lead toward separation of couples in the future."
According to statistics from Council of Judicial, 35 percent of divorce cases in Kurdistan's capital city, Erbil, were because of a lack of understanding between the couples.
According to Tahir, Kurdish people do not read books, which is why they do not have an adequate social background, adding: "if men and women talk about their problems in a rational way, then they can easily understand each other. This will create a more peaceful environment in a family."
To solve this problem, men should try to reschedule their lives and spend more time at home especially at nights and share their passions with their family members, according to Tahir, who believes that: "Women's feelings and emotions are much significant than money."
Roshna Zana, 24, has been married since 2009. She works in a government organisation and is financially independent. She complained about her husband for spending his time outside rather than at home.
"My husband works two shifts in two different companies. He is trying harder than I expected. I am wondering why my husband does not want to understand that his family is as important as his job," she told The Globe while she was heading towards Erbil"s court. She added that her problem started when her husband found his second job.
In addition, she remarked that her husband comes home around midnight every day. "He thinks home is a place to sleep like a hotel," said Zana.
"When he gets back home he does not even talk one word with me."
However, Zana said that their economic condition was not that good and her husband was working hard to find more sources of revenue. "Frankly, I prefer my husband works one shift with less money and allocate some time for the family, rather than spend too much time outside and pay no attention to me and the children."
Some women believe that their husbands bring their work duties home, contributing to a boring and stagnated home environment.
Naz Ahmed, 28, is another woman who complaints about her husband for bringing his duties to home. She was shopping in Majidi Mall, one of the luxury shopping centres, and explained that her life-partner is careless about educating their children and fulfilling other social responsibilities.
"He should understand that the family needs his passions. Our economical condition is very good and he does not need to work that hard and spend too much time with his job."
On the other hand, some women are satisfied in spite of the excessive work commitments of their husbands. They claim their husbands still take care of their social activities as well as working extra hours.
Sewa Mahmud, 31, is a government employee and said her husband works two shifts, but he still manages to take care of the family.
"When he gets back home from working, he shares his thrill among the family members. We would share our ideas to tackle problems."
Some men believe the need to work hard is a justification at women as life has become more complicated and prices are higher.
Ali Jamal works in the public sector and gets approximately $450 per month. He pays more than half of this salary for their rented house. That's why he decided to work two shifts to earn more money in order to manage his life.
"I know working too much will have negative effects on the family because I cannot allocate enough time to my wife and children. But there is no other way; and I do hope my wife does not think that she is been scarified and understands the situation."